La Maison Victor: Fran dress

You know a dress is a winner when you wear it to work on your birthday and two separate people ask if you're pregnant when you're most definitely not.

Yeah. That happened.

Fortunately, I have now officially reached the age of Give No Sh*ts (see also: pink hair; tattoo). Turns out that people find it extra doubly embarrassing when you refuse to be embarrassed by their embarrassing remark - and friends, I must admit that I found it just ever so slightly EXTREMELY satisfying to see them squirm.

Plus, besides the Giving of No Sh*ts, I had fashion on my side. OVERSIZED IS A THING! And why should those of us who know that be cowed by the maternity assumptions of those who don't?!! It's hella wide and gloriously comfortable!

So, reasons why this is a brilliant dress:

1. Shape: on trend! (Probably. Right? I don't really care anyway!)

2. Fabric: viscose! FABRIC OF THE GODS. Light and flowy and warm YES PLEASE THANK YOU, especially for only 6 euros/metre (Brusselites, get yourselves to Berger, they currently have it in various prints).

3. Fit: nailed! You'd think a loose dress like this doesn't need much fitting, but it's absolutely got to hang right or it really will resemble a maternity outfit. I started with my high bust measurement, traced off the corresponding size and then...

• Added a dart. Much as I love the dartless FBA, given that I was adding 2" width to a woven bodice, I wanted more precision. I used the paper pattern piece to locate my bust point and determine where/how long I wanted it, and I must say it turned out perfect. You'd hardly know it's there. STEALTH DART!
• Lengthened the bodice centre front by 1", i.e. also more room for the boobs.
• Shortened the bodice centre back by 1", i.e. swayback adjustment.
• Did a 1cm forward shoulder adjustment and...
• ... a 0.5cm narrow shoulder adjustment.

Guys, this dress fits so well it actually feels weird! I have NEVER before worn a dress that didn't constantly need to be pulled forward, and where the sleeves sit perfectly on the edge of my shoulders. Or a dress with a gathered rectangle skirt that didn't ride up in front and hang low at the back. The whole thing just stays put where it is, from the moment I put it on. It's like a whole new way to wear clothes! And it's incredible what a difference this all makes to how flattering it is ("when's it due" questions aside). It is far superior to my Lucie dress - which is very much the same shape and concept, but infinitely less wearable because I didn't make the same adjustments.

Yep. That's my face for "I Officially Love This Dress".

Almost as much as I Officially Love Biscuits And Cake.

OK actually maybe I can understand the pregnancy comments after all.

(Pattern: Fran dress, La Maison Victor, 3rd edition 2016. Slight hang-ups about other people's opinions: model's own)